hello. i realised i haven't properly introduced myself so here goes.
haha.
Okay im jolene, i come from st nicholas girls, 2UNITY(:
i like swimming, crapping, joking, drawing, sleeping!
the problem is, i lost my talk ability. its somewhere in someplace so i need to go and get it back, but its not so easy as you think, as there would sure be security and stuff. blahblah.

I like blue and green. I am the proud owner of huge eyebags. I am short but tall enough, fat but thin enough, happy but disgruntled enough, pacifist but assertive enough, wild but cautious enough, observant but self-absorbed enough. I am nothing and I am everything.

I am alive.


so, about me. hmmm i wasn't a good kid. i stole and cheated : i started by stealing jelly from my school's aunty may shop; then it went on to correction tape in the bookshop and drinks at the drinks stall. i got scolded for somehow wanting to go to macs during recess in primary 4 and ich was caught eating in primary 6 which ended me with a zero point zero for my maths test. They even had to underline and bold it but its fine cause i learnt i guess. actually it wasn't really cheating it was more of talking but nevermind i didn't really feel very angry with the teacher or so. I also stole from someone a large sum of money and i just stopped around in Jan. But i didn't stop everything yet, i went to cheat a restraunt of about $30 with Mercury, we had free lunch and we ran off you see, yet they don't really know, cause they gave the reciept first. thats about it, but that was the past, i was pretty money-faced too but thats last time right, the worst thing was that i didn't feel guilty.

Now, i finally felt guilty and i started to belief in jesus christ, my xavier. he really does miracles and i found out that i was wrong and i sinned a lot but i know that god forgives so i confessed in my prayers and now i pray everyday! i really believe that god exists as my eyes have been working through miracles these days, they're not feeling that pain anymore. So now i don't sin and that day when Mercury and Venus and i found $30 worth of fiesta tickets, they went to pick it up and i know it was wrong so i told them it was wrong but they said they couldn't possibly throw it back onto the floor and i felt it was right so they used it, maybe i used a bit? but really it wasn't a lot and Venus said it was god's way of rewarding us for the nice banner we made(:

so if you read all the way till here, i guess you're someone interesting cause this has been a pretty boring post, and anyway its time to introduce Mercury and Venus.
their names have been protected for privacy reasons.

Mercury
Mercury can somehow say is my best friend. She irritates me everyday and i irritate her a lot too but haha. and i think she's oily and slimy and acnely and pimply and brownishly and facefatly. she is funny and makes me happy(sometimes) and its a rule that me and her should go out everyday after school. we own a big house, all around singapore. thats our secret places except that they are like part of a house. We have a carpark, a garden, a corridor, a condominium with basketball courts; a rundown playground with broken equipment; a large hall which is dusty and haven't been used for pretty long; and with vandalism over the walls. thats our second house, our condo. haha. so we also have a dining area and a living room and even a river thats where i get to take all my photos. we like to explore new places and we tried to plant a mango tree before but it didn't sprout. we tried eating plant sap and it was tasteless and i love Mercury, even though we fight everyday!

Venus
Venus is someone special like me. She has the same traits as me, she likes to do lame things which i like too. example, we will pretend to kill ourselves? hahaha. anyway i knew Venus since primary 5, but we splited and came back together this year. she is a bit oily and has somekind of ah-lian hair and some pimples on her face and she has fats and she calls me fatso and i call her fatso and we both are fatsos yay! haha. we just created a magazine called spotlight and if you're free you could grab it off seven eleven, not forgetting to come and donate 10cents to our marker fund! haha. Venus also irritates me a lot, sometimes cause she really PMS and its with a double s and when she does it i get really pissed too. but nevermind i also love Venus!

I'll introduce more in future, the other 7 planets next time when i come to them. at the moment, i read something funny yesterday which inspired me to start blogging like so long.

1. I told this girl today that I occasionally look at her boobs.

She said, "Of course! They're nice and big." Obviously she is so my favourite type of person to waste time with. (No it's not the boobs, it's the sense of humour.) Then I told her I was going to tilt the screen of my Macbook so I could surreptitiously glance at her boobs via the reflection, which was met with her approval. She has a crush on a hot and unfortunately fictional lesbian TV character called Shane, and I was going to nickname her Mrs. Shane McCutcheon To-Be (MSMTB), except that recently she found herself in love with the stand-up comedian Bridget McManus. And wanting them both. At the same time. So I've decided to call her Mrs. _ To-Be (M_TB), so she can fill in the blank on her own with all the names she wants.


2. There's this other girl who loves playing Neopets (an online game catering to a *cough* much younger audience) during law lectures and seminars.

I am going to call her Neobuddy. When I first met her, I was exhilarated because within five minutes I was told a (long) list of things she ate the day before, the size of her pants and the difficulty she has finding nice shorts because according to her she has a big butt. I do not think her butt size can beat mine, ever. This afternoon M_TB and I were discussing April Fool's pranks to pull on Neobuddy... Later on, as per our plan, I asked Neobuddy, "Do you masturbate?" She looked at me blankly and said, "No... I don't know how to." I replied, "Would you like me to show you?" She continued staring at me until M_TB and I cracked up. Neobuddy then proceeded to tell us how she used to think that girls couldn't masturbate, until her brother informed her otherwise, but that she still doesn't know how to.

I did not show her.

ahaa i think its funny cause i did laugh pretty much and it should be meant for Mercury cause shes so horny ha.

Here's something else ha.
Me: You didn't order a present for me from this website, did you? 'Cause I bought something for you there!

Her: Nope I didn't.

Me: Okay good.

27 January 2008:

Her: Darlingggggg

Me: Yeah?

Her: I'm going to tell you something, but you must promise not to be angry okay?

Me: Sure, what?

Her: I accidentally mailed your present to my address in Singapore!

Me: (trying not to laugh) HAHAHAHAHAHA

5 February 2008:

Her: You know something?

Me: Hmm?

Her: I checked my mailbox today and found the package I wanted to ship to you...

Me: So you shipped it to your US apartment instead of to me????

Her: (sheepish) Yeah....

Me: hahahahahaahaah

14 February 2008:

Her: I want to show you the present I got for you that I mailed to myself!

Me: Okay!!!

(Her shows me the gift.)

Me: Umm...

Her: Oh shit... You don't like it? You're not even pretending to like it... Is it that bad??

Me: ...

Her: TT

Me: Um, I got that for you.

Her: No, I got that for you.

Me: What???

Her: Wait, let me check... Eh??? The online receipt says I actually mailed my gift to your address... So this is the present you mailed over?!

Okay im going to do my layout now, also you can ask anything you like just email me at icecreammeltedinthefridge@hotmail.com! haha. LOVES;

Snips & Scissors.